Harry decoded: Body language expert reveals Duke 'addresses Charles direct'

Harry decoded: Body language expert reveals Duke 'addresses Charles direct' when discussing 'history repeating itself' with Meghan and isn't self-conscious when he 'acts out his distress' for live therapy session

• Harry claimed Prince Charles made him 'suffer' as child in new AppleTV+ show
• Accused Royal Family of 'total silence' and 'neglect' when Meghan was suicidal
• Body language expert Judi James says the prince exhibits 'signs of anger'

By HAYLEY RICHARDSON FOR MAILONLINE

PUBLISHED: 00:09 AEST, 22 May 2021 | UPDATED: 01:25 AEST, 22 May 2021

 

Prince Harry 'addressed Prince Charles directly' and showed gestures of 'mimed aggression' when discussing how 'history was repeating itself' with his wife Meghan Markle during his new docuseries, a body language expert has claimed.

During The Me You Can't See, the Apple TV+ show he co-produced with Oprah Winfrey, the Duke of Sussex, 36, claimed Prince Charles made him 'suffer' as a child - something royal commentators have claimed will 'hurt' the Prince of Wales deeply.

He also allowed cameras to film him undergoing an 'extraordinary' therapy session, during which he received 'eye movement desensitisation and reprocessing' (EMDr) treatment for anxiety attacks he said are triggered every time he flies into Britain.

 

Speaking to FEMAIL, body language expert Judi James said she observed a 'powerful' body language moment where Harry appeared to be addressing his father directly.

She also claimed his therapy session showed him unselfconsciously 'acting out his distress' in the style of a 'role-play' to share his techniques with others suffering.

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Prince Harry 'addressed Prince Charles directly' and showed gestures of 'mimed aggression' when discussing how 'history was repeating itself' with his wife Meghan Markle during his new docuseries, a body language expert has claimed

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Judi said Harry re-lives his anger using pointing and stabbing gestures when he discusses previous times of trauma

Prince Harry takes aim at Prince Charles in Apple TV series

 

 

'We see three strong sets of emotional reveal from Harry in this first documentary about mental health. First is the unmasked version with signals of sadness and vulnerability, then the very angry, resentful version with eye-narrowing and lip-jutting and lastly the "adult, in control" version of Harry, who appears calmer and as something of a guru or therapist himself.'

She added: 'There is a very powerful body language moment in this episode where Harry appears to be addressing his father Charles directly.

 

'He begins by making comparisons between his mother's fate and Meghan. When he asks himself about regrets in a rhetorical format he shows signs of anger again as he replies he regrets "not taking a stance earlier and calling out racism".

'His finger points in a stabbing gesture of mimed aggression and his blink rate increases. He makes comparisons to his mother's circumstances using the pointing gestures and ending in a wry, mirthless laugh to suggest disbelief.

'Harry's hands stir in the air when he says it was "incredibly triggering to potentially lose another woman in my life" - and again the wry, understated smile of disbelief that history could repeat itself.

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Judi said Harry makes comparisons to his mother's circumstances using the pointing gestures and ending in a wry, mirthless laugh to suggest disbelief

'History repeating itself': Harry compares his relationship to Diana

 

 

'He then says that it "comes back to the same people", and Charles is shown on screen with his young son.

'It is at this point that Harry appears to be "posting" his conversation directly at his father, even using the word "you" when he says "You chose".'

Harry accused the Royal Family of 'total silence' and 'total neglect' when Meghan was suicidal, adding: 'Before the Oprah interview had aired, because of their headlines and that combined effort of The Firm and the media to smear her, I was woken up in the middle of the night to her [Meghan] crying in her pillow - because she doesn't want to wake me up because I'm already carrying too much.'

He admitted he wished he had 'called out the racism' when he first started dating Meghan, but said he would no longer accept it after fearing 'losing another woman' in his life.

Judi said there are some 'subtle clues' that suggest tension and anxiety within the prince, especially when he talks about his four years of therapy.

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Prince Harry carries out movements such as crossing his arms while remembering events in his past during therapy. Judi said: 'Harry's therapy session looks like a role-play to share helpful techniques with people needing similar help and Harry enters the role-play seriously and earnestly, as though doing the real thing without cameras filming him'

'Harry becomes less assured at this point, fiddling with his wedding ring to suggest a desire to channel Meghan's reassuring presence and speaking about himself in the third person - "for an individual who never thought they would need or do therapy" - rather than speaking personally.

'Harry’s anger begins to become obvious here though as he mimes pushing away with both hands to describe how he was treated in the past.'

Judi said Harry's gestures become 'expressive and creative' while talking about how London is a ‘trigger’ for him.

'We see Harry sitting looking emotionally empty at the start of this section,' she explained.

'Seeing a man we always used to see laughing and joking sitting staring expressionless at the floor is distressing but when we switch to seeing Harry talking about his therapy he looks overjoyed to be discovering reasons and answers for his feelings and behaviours. He becomes expressive and open in his body language, again miming or mimicking in a bid to share his experiences and his current understanding of them.

Prince Harry crosses arms and closes eyes during EDMR session

 

 

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The Duke of Sussex closes his eyes during a therapy session shown in the new Apple TV documentary series. Judi said Harry's gestures become 'expressive and creative' while talking about how London is a ‘trigger’ for him

'He looks upward to search as he choses his words like "worried" and "concerned" and then mimes a very exaggerated facial wince straight to camera to show how "tense and tight" he felt flying back into London. He even mimes flying in with one swooping hand as though words might not be enough to get his messages across. This over-congruence looks a little like a parent explaining to a child, suggesting a desire to have his audience understand and empathise almost first-hand.

'Harry's therapy session looks like a role-play to share helpful techniques with people needing similar help and Harry enters the role-play seriously and earnestly, as though doing the real thing without cameras filming him. It’s a rather intimate-looking moment because he actually acts out his distress and his "tuning in’ to the inner emotions without any sign of self-consciousness.

'Harry closes his eyes with a deep sigh to focus on the area of the problem then sits up and sniffs and grimaces to settle into the therapy. The folded arms and self-pats are filmed from two angles here with the second seeming to feature Harry’s wedding ring, again hinting at Meghan’s important role in his "healing".'

When discussing his childhood and talking about his mother, Judi said Harry's voice 'deepens, softens and seems to crack as though he is near to tears'.

Harry's therapy session was filmed and shown on the new Apple TV documentary series The Me You Can't See. Judi said: ''Harry closes his eyes with a deep sigh to focus on the area of the problem then sits up and sniffs and grimaces to settle into the therapy'

'There is a micro-gesture of disgust as he wrinkles his nose at one point,' she observed. 'The angry Harry returns with Oprah now as he uses mime gestures like horses’ hooves to re-live the experience of Diana’s funeral. He re-lives his anger of the time here too, using pointing and stabbing gestures and with his eyes narrowing as he says "This is my mum". His lower lip juts, his hands ball into fists and his blink rate becomes more rapid.'

By the end of the series in episode five, Judi said we see Harry back in his 'calm, adult power pose', speaking to Oprah.

She observed that his 'summary' towards the end triggered new gestures 'associated with self-calming or suppressing thoughts or emotions'.

'He face-touches here, touching his lips in a self-comfort ritual before changing position to touch his face with his other hand. He also scratches his neck and plays with his wedding ring,' Judi noted.

'When he speaks he sounds on-message again, referring to his "awakening" and defining time via some invisible brick gestures that separate chunks of his past, present and future life into different themes.

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'There is huge emphasis here on his rubbing and fiddling with his wedding ring to suggest the support and comfort he gets from his wife and the pose and background imply a sense of reflective peace and solitude and found freedom with Meghan,' Judi concluded

'He places his finger to his lips and pauses when asked if he is still controlled by the media and then he rubs his lips to suggest mixed feelings of possible unease and a desire to self-comfort.'

When he discusses the couple's previous explosive Oprah interview, Judi said Harry is 'emphatic' that he 'spoke the truth in the most compassionate way possible' - despite many royal commentators claiming the Firm would be deeply hurt by their accusations of institutional racism and neglect.

It prompted the Queen to issue a statement after the programme aired, which stated: 'The whole family is saddened to learn the full extent of how challenging the last few years have been for Harry and Meghan.

'The issues raised, particularly that of race, are concerning. While some recollections may vary, they are taken very seriously and will be addressed by the family privately.'

'Harry then uses mime gestures to mime a gap in front of his body as he describes leaving an "opening for reconciliation and healing",' Judi went on.

Prince Harry: 'We spoke truths in a compassionate way' with Oprah

 

 

'Harry is equally sharing and open when he speaks about how Meghan cried the night before the interview. He actually shares by miming the act and then miming the hug he gave her. His body language and his words are very emphatic here as he says she "cried and cried and cried".

This revelation is followed by shots of Harry driving and sitting in a forest 'reflectively'.

'There is huge emphasis here on his rubbing and fiddling with his wedding ring to suggest the support and comfort he gets from his wife and the pose and background imply a sense of reflective peace and solitude and found freedom with Meghan,' Judi concluded.

 

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Duchess put on a brave facade but reached for her husband's hands while he sat 'stony-faced' after smiling for the cameras, body language expert claims

 

Meghan Markle put on a brave face to mask her pain while Prince Harry gave away tell-tale signs of anxiety during their appearance at London's Royal Albert Hall, a body language expert claimed.

Harry and Meghan were seen sitting together as the lights went down at the concert in January 2019, before the Duchess started crying. Speaking to FEMAIL, Judi James said Meghan was able to mask what what we now know went on behind the scenes and appeared 'gracious and elegant'.

'She reaches for Harry's hand frequently and when she sits she reaches for it and places it in both of her hands,' Judi observed. 'Harry's facial expression does appear more telling. His eyes looks wide at times and he is seen sucking his lips in once the attention is off him, suggesting he is struggling with anxiety or some sort of pain or worry.

'Like Meghan he appears keen to look animated and sociable when he is doing his job but his demeanour does seem to change to something a lot more serious when the lights are lowered.'

When Harry speaks about his wife in the docuseries, Judi said his gestures became 'very emphatic, clear and precise' before he got emotional when he described how she was feeling when she shared her suicidal thoughts with him.

'He uses a pursed-finger hand to baton his messages and he uses that finger-pinch to draw vertical and horizontal lines in the air to be forensic with his words and memories,' she explained.

'He also starts to be overcome with emotion, tearing up with his voice cracking. He says that they only had time for a "quick cuddle" before having to go out and get on with their royal duties.'

During the series Harry revealed that it was Meghan who pushed him to get therapy during an argument to finally address the trauma he experienced after losing his mother when he was 12. Judi said Harry's body language during this discussion suggested Meghan 'really was the one who "save" him at this low point'.

'He begins to fiddle with his wedding ring,' she says. 'Harry slows and becomes calmer when he speaks about Meghan and he appears to mime her side of their conversations, throwing his hands out palms-up to repeat her suggestion that "I think you need to see someone".

'Harry uses his body language to role-play both sides in the argument they had, using the open hands and calm of Meghan versus the self-protective fist-shapes as he first thinks "How dare you" about the thought he needed help. His palm-swipe appears to mimic her listing of his problems before he rubs his wedding ring again.'

Meghan first revealed the trauma of the night at the Royal Albert Hall in her March interview with Oprah.

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The biggest personal revelations from Prince Harry's series with Oprah

 

'It was like that for me so it's going to be like that for you': Harry criticises his father Charles for continuing the cycle of generational suffering

Harry said: 'That doesn't make sense. Just because you suffered, that doesn't mean your kids have to suffer. In fact, quite the opposite. If you suffered, do everything you can to make sure that whatever negative experiences you had, you can make it right for your kids.'

'Isn't this all about breaking the cycle?' he asked, rhetorically. 'Isn't this all about making sure that history doesn't repeat itself.'

 

'This is my mum. You haven't even met her': Harry hit out at mourners at Diana's funeral who showed 'ten times' as much emotion as he could

 

'When my mum was taken away from me at the age of 12, just before my 13th birthday, I didn't want the [royal] life. Sharing the grief of my mother's death with the world,' he said.

'For me, the thing I remember the most was the sound of the horses' hooves going along the pavement. Along the Mall, the Red Brick Road. By this point I was, both of us were in shock. It was like I was outside of my body and just walking along doing what was expected of me.

'Showing one tenth of the emotion that everybody else was showing. I thought, "This is my mum. You never even met her".'

He continued: 'I was so angry with what happened to me and the fact there was no justice at all. I don't want to think about it because it's going to bring up the fact that I can't bring her back'.

'I always wanted to be normal as opposed to Prince Harry. Just being Harry. It was a puzzling life. But unfortunately, when I think about my mum the first thing that comes to mind is always the same one over and over again.'

 

Harry says Royals tried to STOP him and Meghan leaving after 'she was going to end her life'

 

'That feeling of being trapped within the family, there was no option to leave. Eventually when I made that decision for my family, I was still told, 'You can't do this.'

'And it's like, 'Well how bad does it have to get until I am allowed to do this?' She [Markle] was going to end her life. It shouldn't have to get to that.'

He said his biggest regret was not taking a stand earlier in his relationship with Markle, claiming a barrage of attacks on her won't stop 'until she dies.

'It's incredibly triggering to potentially lose another woman in my life,' Harry said in the interview with Oprah. 'Like the list is growing, and it all comes back to the same people, the same business model, the same industry.'

 

Claims Royals showed 'total neglect' for his and 'struggling' Meghan's mental health

 

'We spent four years trying to make it work,' he says on the show. 'We did everything that we possibly could to stay there and carry on doing the role and doing the job. But Meghan was struggling.'

He said the way Meghan was feeling reminded him of his own mother's final days.

'History was repeating itself,' he said in an interview with Oprah. 'My mother was chased to her death while she was in a relationship with someone who wasn't white. And now look what's happened.

Ultimately, he claimed, he and Meghan had to leave the U.K. to 'put our mental health first.'

'That's what we're doing,' the prince said, 'and that's what we'll continue to do.'

 

Harry says he was 'worried and afraid' to return to the UK for Prince Philip's funeral

 

'I was worried about it, I was afraid,' Harry told The Associated Press during a recent joint interview with Oprah Winfrey to promote the series.

He said he relied on coping skills learned in therapy.

'It definitely made it a lot easier, but the heart still pounds,' said Harry, the Duke of Sussex and grandson of Britain's Queen Elizabeth II and her late husband Philip.

 

Harry tells trauma therapist of his fears about visiting the UK - and shares EMDR session that has 'freed him'

 

Prince Harry said: 'For most of my life I've always felt worried, concerned, a little bit tense and uptight whenever I fly back into the UK, whenever I fly back into London.

'And I could never understand why. I was aware of it, I wasn't aware of it at the time when I was younger, but after I started doing therapy stuff I became aware of it.

'I was like, why do I feel so uncomfortable? And of course for me London is a trigger, unfortunately, because of what happened to my mum, and because of what I experienced and what I saw.'

He told London-based anja Oakley, a UK-based psychotherapist who used to be a trauma specialist for London Underground: 'Happens every time. I can't remember the first time it happened, I can just remember the feeling, anxiety, like a hollow empty feeling almost of nervousness, is it fear? Everything feels tense.

'It's being the hunted, and being helpless and knowing that you can't do anything about it. There is no escape. There is no way out of this.'

 

Prince Harry says he believed his 'compassionate' Oprah Winfrey interview would 'leave door open to reconciliation' with his family

 

Prince Harry said: 'The interview was about being real and authentic. And hopefully sharing an experience which we know to be incredibly relatable to people around the world, despite our unique privileged position.'

He continued: 'Before the Oprah interview had aired, because of the combined efforts of The Firm and the media to smear her, I was woken up in the middle of the night to her crying into her pillow because she doesn't want to wake me up because I'm already carrying too much. That's heartbreaking.'

The couple were accused of 'blowing up the royal family' after the interview, in which they laid bare the extent of their rift with the Queen and other senior royals and accused The Firm of racism, sent shock waves around the world.

 

Harry says he felt forced to go to Nepal and his constant jet-setting as the family's 'yes man' became 'hectic to the point of exhaustion'

 

Harry said: 'I was travelling all over the place because, you know, from the family's perspective I guess I was the person who like ''we need someone to go there. Nepal, Harry you go''.

'I was always the yes man I was always the one willing to say yes. But that yes and yes and yes of course yes yes yes led to burnout.

'And it was like someone had taken the lid off. All of the emotions that I had suppressed for so many years suddenly came to the forefront.'

He added: 'I saw GPs, I saw doctors, I saw therapists I saw alternative therapists, I saw all sorts of people.

'But it was meeting and being with Meghan - I knew that if I didn't do therapy and fix myself, that I was going to lose this woman who I could see spending the rest of my life with.'

 

Prince Harry says he feels Diana's presence with him in California and believes she would be 'incredibly proud'

 

Reflecting on the move to the US, he said: 'Making this move was really scary. At every possible opportunity the forces working against us tried to make it impossible. Did I expect to find ourselves in this situation so quickly? No. I think we've done a really good job.

'I have no regrets. It's really sad but I have no regrets at all because now I'm at a place where I think I should have been four years ago...

'Now we've got a beautiful little boy who keeps us busy, keeps us running around, he makes us laugh every day. We've got two dogs. And another little baby girl on the way. I never dreamt that.

'I have no doubt my Mum would be incredibly proud of me. I'm living the life that she wanted to live for herself. Living the life that she wanted us to be able to live.

'Not only do I know that she's incredibly proud of me, but that she's helped me get here. And I've never felt her presence more than I have over the last year. I wish she could have met Meghan. I wish she was around for Archie.'

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Prince Harry 'addresses Charles direct' in new series, body language expert claims